It was just another day at the younger kids house.
A normal Wednesday routine; Wash the kids, clean the house, feed the kids,
clean the kids, wipe the tears, and feed the kids again.... Or so I
thought.
Yesterday was actually a different kind of day. A day
where I find myself being sanctified.
And trustfully being sanctified by grace.
There has been another flu going around, it seems
everyone at The Village gets a turn to enjoy the pleasure. Yesterday, the two
youngest boys, Tumi and Sthembile, were the receivers of the stomach flu.
So the day was not quite the same as every other. Still
entailing the listed norm., we also filled the day with the tasks of caring for
two sick little babies.
You know Tumi must really be sick when he doesn't
want to eat.
I was hoping my motherly instincts would come out
for two reasons. I was praying
(selfishly) that would be protected by the "Moms don't ever get sick"
policy/ super-power all our moms seem to have; anticipating the week ahead
where Laurie and I are house mothering Wednesday- Sunday evening (because I really
don't want to be sick again.) Also praying for the knowledge and energy
to take care of two little sick ones, along with "The Terrible Two."
I was surprised at what came out of me that
day.
I found that God gave me just what I needed. He
supplied me with the ability to care like a mother.
As you may have guessed already, Laurie and I are
back on the job as part time house mothers. We will be doing this together until
Laurie leave in 13 days, then I will be taking the role, at least during the
day times, on my own.
As I held the sick little baby, I was thinking of
all the ways I have found a change in myself since being at Restoring Hope
Village. I guess didn’t really know what all I was getting myself into :).
I knew that house parenting was one thing we might do,
but only God knew the plans He had in teaching me the transformation I would
undergo in becoming like a mother to these kids.
There are many ways I could, would, and have taken
pride in having this title, or knowing the feelings of mother. The more I learn
and do, the more I realize the shame doing so. I count noting my gain, if it
does not first give glory to my Father, the One who is The Giver of all I claim
as pure joy. For that is what true joy is- in giving the praise to God.
I was thinking of all the motherly traits that seem
to have come out of nowhere in me. Sure, I have taken care of few children
before, and watched my mother and sister care for their own; but really, where
does the impulse to put your own spit on your hand to clean snot off someone
else's face come from?!?
I have found myself doing things like this, or
thinking and feeling emotions I have only heard descriptions of from mothers.
I am tempted to be thankful for “mother's instincts”
I hoped would come out of me as a woman, but am stopped by the unfulfilled
truth in that.
Yeah, when a woman learns to care for a child
there is a different kind of love and tenderness that flowers in a new way from
her, but I cannot too quickly count that as where this change has happened in me.
I am not to too quickly lay to waste the call for
praise that I may joy in. For I know beyond anything, all that I have learned
and developed in motherly care is from God the Father.
He is the one who has truly given me the care for
these kids. God is the One who gives me the love of a mother to patently tend
to a flu sick baby (mess and all), and the one who makes it joy to put aside
the want to look good because you are no longer first priority in the morning.
He is the One who is the example of loving parent.
It would be foolishness to count nature the reason
for my change of heart. I know that God
has given me this love, not for my own pride but for His name. For as I love, I come as a servant of a great household- a
kingdom of light that is unshakable- I come as a servant, doing only the work
of their master, to show the glory of the Master’s
household.
A servant does not do anything that his master has
not already told him to do. He has not anything his master has not given him;
and the majesty of the house is not anything the servant can be accounted of
giving towards. But the work of a servant is to labor, and work, and present
the house as he has been commanded to do, so that when the time for the great
household is presented the servants will be nowhere to be seen, but the glory
of the master will be shown in full.
In the bible it teaches us that we are servants of
the Most High God, for HIS glory!
...and our joy.
For even Jesus- who was God Himself- did not
consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made Himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant; He humbled Himself, and became obedient to
death- even death on a cross... Therefore God exalted Him to the highest
place... THAT at the name of Jesus, every knee shall bow, and every tongue
confess, that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. (Philippians
2)
Joy is the blessing, love is the fruit, peace is
the preserver, but the magnification of our God - The Giver of all these- is
the purpose!
God's kingdom has never been in danger from losing
its glory and never will. So my work and love are not dependent upon its
richness, but I have found-since learning the things of a mother, and serving
the Lord here at Restoring Hope Village- it is privilege to work unto the
Lord this way. My pride is not in being a "mom," but in serving the
Lord.
Let my pride be striped from me, and He, be higher
lifted up.
I am being sanctified. It can be very challenging,
but I see that it is indeed by
grace!
And so sweet that grace is!
Yesterday, after the long and messy day of flu, the
older kids got home from school, and we started to make supper. And it began to
rain: one of Laurie and I's favorite things. We were winding down the day
getting ready to leave- tired and a little worn- ready to go home.
All day I had all these half thoughts,
processing the book I just wrote above. When, so sweetly we were blessed
with joy.
The baby finally sleeping in your arms…a beautiful
sky… mhhhm, the smell of rain… and Kamohelo digging something up in the muddy
yard.
Kamohelo brought to both Laurie and I a beautiful
selection of yellow weeds, potted in an old mayonnaise jar. The sweetest
gift a girl could receive!
And as I we finished up the day, this song went
ringing through my head.
